THINGS I'VE LEARNED FROM MY FACEBOOK NEWSFEED THIS WEEK

10/22/15
  1. 1.
    The Mets are a team that plays baseball
  2. 2.
    People still remember that Michael J Fox movie and seem to be pretty pissed we all don't have hoverboards.
  3. 3.
    My friends overestimate their coordination and assume they would be adept at riding hoverboards.
  4. 4.
    It's time to pledge to NPR
  5. 5.
    My friends and I are total nerds who pledge to NPR
  6. 6.
    The media still really wants me to care about the Kardashians (luckily none of my friends do).
  7. 7.
    Drake moves funny
  8. 8.
    All you have to do in this country to get paid time off is to be white and shoot an innocent black man.
  9. 9.
    Videos of babies, animals, and baby animals seem to be in infinite supply and are the only thing that keeps your Facebook feed from looking like the global panic attack it really is.
  10. 10.
    Too many people are still running for president. (If you have less than 1% it's time to go chase a new American Dream. I'm looking at you, Lincoln Chaffee.)