Free Dismembered Foot With Purchase
Just a (kind of) normal Wednesday morning.
- •I go outside to hang my red and white "OPEN" flag.This dude is standing on the side of the street, looking like he's waiting for a bus or for a ride.
- •He saunters in, maybe about an hour later."I keep on looking at the windows and wondering what's in here."
- •We just installed a gorgeous new fall window display yesterday.The windows look damn excellent, so I totally get it. Although, the answer is: shoes. Specifically women's shoes, but whatever.
- •He looks around; his attention focuses on a pair of bright nautical red European walking shoes.Cute as a button--black outsole and laces, red knit uppers. Like a sock with an outsole. Made in Portugal.
- •He picks one up, looks at price tag on bottom, makes a face and looks at me."Geez, do they come with a murdered foot in them?"
- •Um.My response: "Excuse me?"
- •He says: "Do you get a murdered person's foot in there? $110 dollars? You can't even wear these in the barn."He lifts the shoe, showing me how light it is and supposedly making the argument that a lightweight shoe should not cost money (unless it contains dismembered body parts, obviously.)
- •Me : "I don't know why anyone would wear a shoe like that in a barn."In my brain: "Fuck youuu."
- •Him: "For the horses."Obviously the only reason people purchase shoes is so they can wear them to muck out a house stall. I can't believe I didn't think about that five years ago before I went and started a shoe store.