What My TED Talks Would Be About

Inspired by @Gola
  1. Dealing With Too-Many-Remotes Anxiety by Saying "Fuck It" & Reading a Book Instead
  2. How To Lose 40 Pounds By Simply Giving Up Most Foods, Cooking Everything From Scratch, And Doing Dishes All Day
  3. How To Gain 50 Pounds By Starting A Business & Dating Someone Who Brings You Delicious Cocktails While You Lounge on The Couch Like A Queen
  4. The Art of Making The Perfect Chinese Takeout Order
  5. Obsessively Spotting Kurt Vonnegut References In Everyday Life
  6. There Is Actually Plenty of Parking if One Considers The Spaces That Are Not The Two Directly In Front of The Shop
  7. The Basics of Supply & Demand as They Relate to Birkenstock's Popularity
  8. Too Many Choices Paralyzes Shoppers (& Why There Aren't More Things In My Store For You To Not Want)
  9. Why Flip Flops Are The Worst For Your Feet & Should be For Beach, Pool, and Post-Pedicure Wearing Only