Toughts I've Had Sitting Next to Your Baby

I really don't like babies
  1. Is it going to puke?
  2. Seriously though are you not seeing this? IS IT GOING TO PUKE?
  3. Why is it staring at me?
  4. I wonder if I could get away with wearing a onesie that has giraffes all over it?
  5. Oh god it started crying.
  6. Is that a boy or a girl? Better just keep my mouth shut.
  7. Yeah don't pay attention to this baby. Your iPhone is way more important. And babies are notoriously self sufficient.