Reasons why Jacob and Hannah's relationship in "Crazy, Stupid, Love" would fail...miserably

Ryan Gosling and Emma Stone's characters in "Crazy, Stupid, Love" meet, fall in love, and live happily every after...except they don't. In real life their relationship would not work and here's why...
  1. Hannah is a lawyer now. She's going to be too busy lawyering to spend time with Jacob.
  2. Jacob is a cad. Hannah will want to trust him but she won't be able to due to his whoring around.
  3. Jacob will act like he's going to get a job or do something worthwhile but he won't follow through with it. He will start community college but end up dropping out and falling back on his family's money.
  4. After dropping out of community college, Jacob will make a last ditch effort to get some kind of job. He will work as a realtor but realize that everyone's house is crap and talk every buyer out of buying any property he is showing.
  5. Cal (played by Steve Carell; Hannah's father in the movie) will never truly be able to accept Jacob into the family since they used to hang out at the bar together and act as each other's wingman. Jacob is dating his little girl...their relationship will never recover which will in turn damage Hannah and Jacob's relationship forcing it to end.
  6. Did you see Jacob's abs? That dude is in the gym 24/7/365...kinda difficult to keep a relationship going when you are a gym rat. Also, Hannah will want to do more worthwhile shit...like visit a museum. Resentment all around.
  7. Jacob was such a man whore that he will have to go to weekly checkups at the health clinic to make sure his gonorrhea is not acting up. This will cause strife in the relationship.
  8. Emily (Julianne Moore's character; Hannah's mother) will continue to hit on Jacob and so will Hannah's gma. Awkward.