SUBSTITUTES FOR BRUSHING TEETH

As tested by Grace and me at varying levels of laziness
  1. Altoids
  2. Andes mint chocolate
  3. Coke
    "Sometimes I'll be in bed about to fall asleep and I'll remember that I forgot to brush my teeth but Joanna will have a Coke so I'll have some and it's like the bubbles just eat up all the germs."
  4. Confidence!
  5. Swallowing all your spit rigorously and being like, "yup, got everything"
  6. Running your tongue over your teeth to scrub them
    Suggested by   @suesmith
  7. Listerine breath strips
    Has the perk of making you feel like you are at a middle school dance
    Suggested by   @maya
  8. Mouthwash, it's like liquid brishing
    Suggested by   @gilbaron
  9. Rubbing your teeth with your shirt!
    Suggested by   @ouizoid
  10. Eating bacon
    Works best in the morning.
    Suggested by   @elooto
  11. Bourbon
    Suggested by   @EricElkins
  12. Eat an apple
    Suggested by   @samantharonson
  13. Chew gum that's usually way too minty.
    Suggested by   @JODYLEE