THINGS I SHOULD MAKE A NEW YEAR RESOLUTION ABOUT, BUT WON'T

  1. To stop eating meals standing at the kitchen counter
    Okay, I don't even have a dining table because my apartment is small AF. And sometimes I'm in a hurry. This one isn't going to happen.
  2. To never let dishes sit in the sink
    @ self you're literally already standing up in the kitchen eating, how about you stand in there for an extra 45 seconds to rinse that plate and put it in the dishwasher? Idk, man.
  3. To try new foods
    I'm a really picky eater and it's not convenient. But I'm also used to it by now? The only reason I'd be doing this is to make other people more comfortable. But I'm selfish and think that everyone needs to get over the way I eat.
  4. To always wait at least a day between hair washes
    Washing every day is super bad for your hair... But, like, my hair gets oily hella fast and I don't want to look like a street urchin.
  5. To just declare a goddamn Russian minor already
    I want to commit to this. But I'm scared. But I'll thank myself for it. But it's a lot of work. But it'll be fun. But my schedule will suck. See?!