How I Entertained Myself Growing Up As An Only Child

I was always busy
  1. Started a "club" in which I was the president, treasurer, and VP so no one could dethrone me when they came over and wanted to join
  2. Talked to myself. A lot.
  3. Read books aloud and made up my own endings when I was bored with the story
  4. Watched tv and ran to the piano to play whichever theme song or commercial jingle I had just heard from memory
    I wish I still had this talent
  5. Ran a travel agency that operated out of the space beneath my dad's desk and only accepted pennies as payment
  6. Hid in the guest room's tiny atrium and read books so I could feel like I was semi-outside (even though we had a backyard so my parents found this odd)
    Probably because it was odd
  7. Built the most lavish, spacious blanket forts you've ever seen and slept in them because I was committed to my work
  8. Quoted "I Love Lucy" episodes with my mom
  9. Pestered my dad into playing "Heart and Soul" with me on piano every single day like clockwork until our timing was perfect (and he was begging me to learn a new song)
  10. Twirled my purple parasol and sang "Meet Me in St. Louis"
    Cybill Shepherd bought me that parasol for my 6th birthday and I would like to be buried with it plz
  11. Hundreds of cartwheels
  12. Played handball against the front door while learning all the lyrics to TLC's "CrazySexyCool"
  13. Noticed how unusually hairy my uncle Allen was, so I covered him in scotch tape while he was sleeping