Men I Wonder About Often

  1. My 10th grade math teacher Mr. Cloud who built couches, drank tea from a cast-iron kettle, attended raves in the desert in his 3-piece suit, and got fired for ranting about his students on LiveJournal
    $20 says he's in Portland and he still smells like a blend of sulfur and patchouli
  2. That positive, upbeat homeless man who used to smoke weed with half of our class in the alley next to the music business building
    I hope he's high and content, wherever he is
  3. Jonathan Taylor Thomas
    I'm sure he's fine but I hope he knows I loved him once
  4. The kid in my college class who said "all women want to be mothers, no matter what they say" and proceeded to get torn apart by every woman in the room (including the professor) for the next 45 minutes
    Please tell me he's dating a hardcore feminist now
  5. The guy who screamed at me and called me a bitch for not giving him my phone number after he held the door open for me at the bank
    Probably in jail