Weird Things That Happened Yesterday
- •My cat woke me up by walking on my face.For the record, this is one of the worst ways to wake up.
- •The crosswalk sign said for me to go, so I started to cross, but cars kept turning right in front of me anyway. A cop ran into traffic with his hands up, yelling, "WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?! LET HER WALK!"Personal hero.
- •I went to return books and run some errands near the Beverly Hills Library, and when I came back to the parking garage to get my car, the garage was barricaded off because a jumper tried to kill himself by jumping off the second level of City Hall.A hot fireman said it would be a while, so I went to La Scala to eat and wait.
- •Cried about the jumper.I'm PMSing and way too invested in other people's pain, even if I don't know what that pain is.
- •While crossing another crosswalk, a photographer crouched at the other end was motioning for me to move out of the way.He was taking some girl's portfolio photos while she crossed Canon in a gown, and I didn't even notice.
- •I looked through my makeup bag and realized my concealer and makeup brush had both gone missing after my friend visited & did her makeup at my house this week.Hmm can't imagine where those went.
- •My ex who bailed when I miscarried back in May (and, as I recently discovered, had been lying to me for years) text messaged me to ask me to dinner. When I didn't answer he called ME selfish and told me to "go to hell, bitch."See you there champ 👋🏻
- •Forgot my glasses at home so I had to drive home in the dark wearing my prescription sunglasses like fucking Corey Hart.....did anyone even get that reference?
- •I saw Flavor Flav on a street corner filming himself on his iPhone while he was talking to paparazzi from TMZ. At the same time, a TMZ tour van filled with tourists drove right by and did not notice.That was easily the weirdest part of this day.