1. A used mattress
    Static
    "Like" brand new.
  2. A lake cabin
    Static
    Why not just murder myself?
  3. A used Liberator sex chaise
    Static
    Hey, guys, it was *just* washed, ok?
  4. A sweet bunny
    Static
    Note- semi potty trained. She's trying guys. Yeah at 3 years old I think that ship has sailed.
    Suggested by @k8zinker
  5. Would only buy wheelchairs brand new after SEINFELD.
    Static
    What if I'm going downhill and something goes wrong?
    Suggested by @k8zinker