Blank as Blank/Blanker Than Blank
I'm originally from Connecticut but I have been living in Georgia for 25 years. I slip in and out of a southern accent depending on the situation but I use southern similes every chance I get. Here is a list of my favorites, bless my heart.
- •I am as full as a tick.
- •She is as drunk as Cooter Brown.
- •He is as useless as balls on a dildo.
- •I am hotter than a whore in church.
- •She looks more tired than a hooker on nickel night.
- •He is finer than a frog hair split four ways.
- •I am busier than a one armed paper hanger.
- •She is as fucked up as a football bat.
- •He is as fucked up as a box full of coat hangers.
- •She is ugly as a dented can of Spam.