THE TIME I ACCIDENTALLY BOUGHT A FAKE PLANT

  1. It was at Crate & Barrel, which, in retrospect, should have been my first clue.
  2. I carried it home in a bag, careful to keep it upright.
  3. I put it with my other plants and showed my friends new plant.
  4. Everyone agreed it was a good plant.
  5. And so hardy, even for a succulent! I'd had it for a month, and it still looked great. I went to check the soil, thinking it must have dried out by then.
  6. The soil was suddenly very obviously painted concrete.
  7. The plant was suddenly very obviously plastic.
  8. This is the plant.
  9. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯