BENEFITS OF HAVING A DUDE'S NAME WHEN YOU'RE A LADY

  1. Employers reviewing your resume assume they should pay you a dollar on the dollar
    They mostly get over it but it's a good place to start the salary negotiation
  2. Cheap way to garner sympathy when you explain to people "my father always wanted a son"
    Works if you say your mom too!
  3. Realize your narcissism's full potential by dating someone with your own name
    This makes you 80% more likely to be chosen to be an Amazing Race team
  4. Ability to refer to yourself as 'the long lost sister' from 90s NBC show "Sisters"
    Remember how they all had boys' names. How on earth did they sell this premise?
  5. Test your boyfriend's homophobia by forcing him to moan your name in bed