THINGS I WOULD RATHER DO THAN GO TO WORK TOMORROW

Let's face it, no one wants to work during the holidays.
  1. Eat my own shit.
  2. Let my cat into my bedroom at night.
  3. Pull my toenails out with pliers.
  4. Have a conversation with my crazy aunt about why I'm not married yet.
  5. Burn my house down.
  6. Eat dinner with Kim Davis one night a week.
  7. Shave my head.
  8. Have to kill my own food for the rest of my life.
  9. Join ISIS.
  10. Vote for Donald Trump.