UPDATE: FUCK YOU TRADER JOE'S, I MADE MY OWN DAMN COOKIES

Soooooo, Trader Joe's sold out of my favorite cookies extra early this year, and I totally cried about it like a bitch (See here: THINGS THAT HAVE MADE ME CRY WHILE PMS-ING, VOL. 3) But joke's on THEM, because I made my own fucking Dark Chocolate Covered Peppermint Joe Joe's! And you can too:
  1. RECIPE FOR DARK CHOCOLATE COVERED PEPPERMINT JAMIE JAMIE'S
  2. Ingredients:
  3. Candy Cane Joe Joe's
    You can use Oreos too, Holiday or Regular, whichever stuffing level suits you
  4. Dark Chocolate Chips
    Again, use any damn chocolate you want, as long as it melts
  5. Peppermint Extract
    Make sure you grab the peppermint and not just mint. Different flavor profiles and you def want peppermint for this.
  6. Candy Canes
    I used mini candy canes simply because they are easier to unwrap. Use whatever candy canes you want.
  7. Directions:
  8. Prepare Candy Cane Sprinkles
    Unwrap candy canes and place in plastic bag. Wrap bag in paper towel and smash the shit out of candy canes until they are in smallish pieces. Very cathartic. Place in bowl and set aside.
  9. Prepare Pans
    Line some cookie sheets with wax paper for ease of removal (and cleaning).
  10. Melt Chocolate Chips
    Place 2 cups of chocolate chips in microwave safe bowl (I don't recommend doing more than that at once.) Microwave on high for 45 seconds and stir vigorously. Microwave on high in 15 second intervals, stirring vigorously in between. You shouldn't need to microwave for longer than 1 min 30 sec total.
  11. Add Peppermint Extract
    Once chocolate is smooth, add about one teaspoon extract to the bowl (it doesn't need to be exact). Stir until combined. Side note: it will look weird at first, but just keep stirring, it'll smooth out and have a consistent color.
  12. Assembling Cookies:
  13. Dunk Cookies in Chocolate
    You want to fully enrobe these sons of bitches. Make sure you get it in the sides too. This is relatively easy at the beginning and increasingly difficult (and messy) as your bowl gets empty.
  14. Tap Off Excess
    Using a fork, lift cookie out of chocolate and tap fork on edge of bowl to remove excess chocolate and smooth out your coating.
  15. Clean Your Bottom
    Gently scrape the bottom of the fork/cookie against the side of the bowl, removing the excess
  16. Place on Cookie Sheet
    Don't place them too close together, noob
  17. Top with Candy Cane Sprinkles
    I let my husband do this part, so you could def have your kids do it.
  18. Let Them Get Hard
    Let cookies sit to get hard. You can speed this up by placing in the fridge/freezer. If you live in a cold weather climate, just set the damn pan outside for a few minutes.
  19. And now you have the "Limited Edition" cookies!
    You can make these any time if you stock up on candy canes. BUT ALSO...
  20. P.S. You can use this recipe to make easy Thin Mints too!
    Just scrape off the filling and cover just the cookie part with chocolate. BOOM! HOMEMADE THIN MINTS!
  21. YOU'RE WELCOME