THINGS I WISH SESAME STREET TAUGHT ME

That I found out too late
  1. How to cook eggs over easy
    Nothing worse than going in over easy and coming out scrambled.
  2. How to kiss
    Not how to fuck. Just basics would've been nice.
  3. Taxes
    If Big Bird can't teach me...
  4. Change a tire
    I'm still only half a man. It's embarrassing.
  5. Confronting confrontation
    As far as I know, there was never a fight on THE Street.
  6. Drive a stick shift
    Ok I'm a quarter of a man
  7. Beauty is on the outside
    At first.
  8. Water will eventually reach dangerous levels in California
  9. How to roll my "r's"
    Suggested by   @trevler