PROS OF WATCHING 2 HOURS OF FOX NEWS A DAY
Gotta do it to make Songify the News. What's the silver lining?
- •Finally start to understand nuances of my Uncle Sean Lennon's Facebook posts(Not to be confused with the real Sean Lennon even though Uncle Sean is older which is kinda a bummer for uncle Sean even though he gets to joke about it a lot at Boy Scout meetings.)
- •Great training for interrupting ppl and asserting dominance at cocktail parties.
- •Implicitly convinces me the 4 hamburgers I eat a week is well below American averageThus constantly encouraging me to raise my hamburger game
- •The ads convinced me to buy all this goldAnd even though price has been dropping precipitously I have heard girls really like gold
- •Don't have to watch MSNBC and Daily Show's constant reportage on Fox News anymore
- •Looking at Bill Oreillys wattle and Sean Hannity's flattop has weirdly started to arouse me.Sad but true OKAY ITS NOT TRUE I JUST NEEDED A BOTTON OKAY