1. It's raining.
  2. It's not raining.
  3. Have to pee.
  4. Just ate an hour ago. Stomach cramps while running blow.
  5. One more episode of HOUSE OF CARDS, I swear.
  6. Misplaced inhaler.
  7. Misplaced running shoes.
  8. Misplaced motivation.
  9. Will never be Usain Bolt, anyway.
  10. Charley horses.
  11. Charles horses.
  12. Chuck horses.
  13. No pigs flying, no color powder thrown at me.