People I Would Like To Be For A Day
I've always wondered what it would be like to be another person.
- 1.Donald TrumpI could cheat on my wife and no one would care.
- 2.Debbie from AccountingShe drives a BMW with eyelashes. They're tacky and I hate them.
- 3.My dogI COULD PEE ON ANYTHING!
- 4.Jim the ButcherI've always wondered what it feels like to have tattoos.
- 5.Merrloth the UnconquerableHe's unconquerable. What more could you ask for?
- 6.The guy who wrote the "Friends" theme songI'd transfer the copyright over to my real self so I could pay for college.
- 7.Vin DieselI mean, just look at those arms. Does he have a permit for those guns?
- 8.Sheila, my dentistShe's also my exes' dentist.
- 9.Kevin in 32CNo reason, he just seems pretty chill.
- 10.Rolie Polie OlieThat motherfucker's happy about goddamn near everything. Like, shit. Look at that cute fucking smile. The bastard has no clue.