1. Courtney Cox found a baby turtle!
  2. Topher Grace is slowly turning inside out for his upcoming role as a horrible pile of guts
  3. Sofia Vergara to time travelers: Stop trying to kill my son!
  4. Mark Zuckerberg will pay other men named Mark to change the spelling of their names to Marc
  5. Alec Baldwin offered 3 wishes by genie, squanders first 2 on toner for his printer
  6. Ellen DeGeneres has my son in a cage and insists I know what I need to do to get him back but I don't know and she doesn't believe me. Is it dancing?
  7. Ben Affleck claims the key to playing Batman is 'always keeping in mind that Batman's driven by a desire to find a way home to Narnia'