COMMON MISTAKES COLLEGE PROFESSORS MAKE

  1. Eating an entire can of Pringles while lecturing and then throwing the empty can against the wall to emphasize a point
    1st timers tend to think this renegade behavior will engage students but it's just annoying
  2. Reminisce about the day Tupac died and cry
    Modern students love Biggie and you won't change their minds
  3. Spoil the ending of Dawn of the Planet of the Apes
    Shit just hit HBO give it a minute
  4. Insist on counting every students teeth at the beginning of each class
    Total cliche
  5. Punish anyone who sends a text during class by making them spit on the grave of their most recently deceased relative and posting a pic to Instagram
    If the sight of someone texting throws you that bad, you should go work in a mine instead