1. 'An armed citizen can prevent a mass shooting'
    Spit in this person's eyes. Ask them why they didn't prevent that. When they open their mouth to respond spit in their mouth and point out that bullets travel faster than saliva and do much more damage
  2. 'Proposed gun laws will put us on a slippery slope'
    Shove this person down the nearest actual slope
  3. 'I have the right to self defense'
    You might ask this person why they think their right to feel safe should come at the expense of everyone else's, but I recommend taking a photo of them and photoshopping it so it looks like they're exposing themselves to the monkeys at the zoo. Distribute this image online. Print it out and hang copies on the bulletin board at the post office. Have shirts made.
  4. 'We should arm teachers'
    Pour maple syrup on this persons hair
  5. 'The real issue is mental illness'
    Drop a copy of the DSM on this persons foot
  6. 'An armed society is a polite society'
    Tell this person to go fuck their mother