ONE TIME I HAD TO FLEE BIRMINGHAM, ALABAMA

  1. When I was 23 I drove from San Diego to Atlanta with 2 female friends
  2. It was generally fun
  3. But one day after a long day on the road we decided to stop in Birmingham, Alabama
  4. We drove around forever looking for a hotel and I finally found a somewhat shitty motor court but figured we'd be okay
  5. That they fished a remote control out of a cardboard box and handed it to us when we checked in should have been a warning but we didn't take it
  6. When we got to the room one friend ran to the bathroom. I opened the closet and saw that it had no ceiling, just open air. I closed the door and pushed the dresser across the room to block the closet door
  7. Then the phone rang
  8. My friend answered it. She listened for a moment and hung up
  9. Said she couldn't understand what the caller was saying
  10. The phone rang again. She answered it.
  11. It was the same person, again unintelligible
  12. She hung up and the phone rang again immediately
  13. This time I answered
  14. It was a man with an extremely slurred voice. He said he saw some females walk into the room and asked if he could come by
  15. I said no thanks
  16. He asked if I was 'running the girls' and I said no
  17. He said, maybe I'll just come over and we'll party
  18. 'No thanks. We're really tired'
  19. "Motherfucker, I said I want a party. What're you gonna do to stop me if I come knocking at your door?"
  20. I hung up. My friend asked me what the guy said. At first I wouldn't tell her but then I did
  21. She turned white
  22. The other girl came out of the bathroom and saw the two of us standing there in tense silence.
  23. She asked who called and I said, get your bags. We're leaving
  24. We ran to the car and peeled out just as this big pickup truck screeched into a spot in front of our room. This huge bedraggled man got out and ATTACKED the door to our room
  25. Banging and shouting
  26. I drove all the way to Atlanta that night. We ended up like 2 days ahead of schedule
  27. I had to pee the whole time but refused to stop
  28. And at some point I realized I was still clutching the motel TV remote control