1. Once upon a time there was a city
  2. And a giant
  3. And when the two got together...
  4. It didn't go well for the city
  5. In response, the military developed a special giant killing tank
  6. When the giant heard about this he was like, Gimme your best shot
  7. So they did
  8. It didn't go well for the giant
  9. The giant become a ghost
  10. Specifically, a giant ghost
  11. Why are you so damn big?
  12. Because I'm the ghost of a giant
  13. That's crazy
  14. You guys are crazy being a giant is normal Being small is weird
  15. If you say so dude
  16. The giant ghost went back to the city and saw that it had been rebuilt
  17. Bit now the city was covered with lights and decorations
  18. What the hell is this, the ghost thought. They're celebrating my death with these colored light?
  19. Just then a man in a sleigh pulled by reindeer arrived
  20. What's up, ghost? Said the man
  21. How can you see me? Asked the ghost
  22. Some kid who didn't like his present in 1977 grew up to become a witch and cursed me so that I can see ghosts, the man said
  23. What the hell is a present?
  24. A gift, the cursed man said. Something you give someone to celebrate them or show you love them
  25. That's really fucked up, said the ghost. Bad enough they're celebrating my death with decorative lights, they give each other things as well. What a bunch of savages
  26. It has nothing to do with you, ghost. It's Christmas
  27. Never heard of it
  28. The cursed man explained that Christmas was the celebration of the day that Jesus was born
  29. Is Jesus the guy who designed the cannon they killed me with?
  30. Not everything is about you, ghost. Maybe that's why you're so angry, because you only think about yourself.
  31. This gave the ghost much to think about