TOTALLY TRUE THINGS I SAID TO MY STUDENTS TONIGHT

  1. I was planning to get your papers back to you tonight but I forgot to grade them
  2. We're getting out a little early tonight because Hannibal is on and I didn't set my DVR
  3. If you meet someone in a position of authority who cares more about helping people than keeping their job take a moment to reflect on the fact that you are in the presence of a miracle
  4. I don't care what you think about gun control at all
  5. Gatsby and Nick don't have sex with each other. I'm not sure what you're thinking about.