MY BEST LIZARD JOKES
These are to be told onstage, painted green, with a large tail protruding at the rear.
- •Why are lizards so bad at finishing stories? Because they always lose their tale
- •What do you tell a very large lizard when his Asian garment is too long? "Hey! Your kimono's draggin!"
- •What's the coldest reptile? A blizzard.
- •What's the warmest reptile? Probably a lizard on a rock, bathing in the sun.
- •What do you call a non-consensual lizard? A rapetile
- •What do you call intercourse between two scaly lovers with tiny arms? Tyrannosaurus Sex.
- •What do you call a lizard with no arms or legs? A snake, silly!
- •What is a lizard's best pickup line? Iguana get to know you.
- •What's a lizard's favorite rapper? Chameleonaire