How Daniel Murphy Can Stay Hot in the Days Off Before the World Series Starts
Daniel Murphy is hot. He looks like the type of guy who would have comically sweaty forearms and an upper lip like a faucet when he's hot. Reddish hue, too. Here's how he can stay hot in the days before the World Series.
- •100 Naked Swings in front of the mirror
- •Centaur Painting Posing
- •NBA JamHe's On Fire!
- •Rage Against The Machine's first albumHe's On Fire!
- •Any New York City apartment this weekend"Hey ThermoStatBoy, can you lower it from Surface Of The Sun to maybe Mouth After Molten Lava?" "No shnoopie, this is a New York City apartment in October, the only setting is Satan's Second to Third Toe Crack After A Half Marathon."
- •Dutch OvenCapitalize on having a teammate named Syndergaard.
- •Icy HotI once put my contact lenses in after applying icy hot. I stayed hot for a month.
- •JamaicaJust got back from a friend's wedding. A gajillion degrees. Had to wring out my suit afterwards. My post-wear suit hanging/pant folding skills are far below the league minimum. Got home and had a surprise live hit and no clothes at the studio. Had to wear the suit. It was in the bottom of the garment bag shaped like Sonic the Hedgehog with moss growing on it. Jamaica is hot in Icktober.
- •Flames. Flames. On the side of his face.