LIES I'VE TOLD THAT PEOPLE BELIEVED

For the record I am a terrible liar
  1. I've watched Breaking Bad
  2. I've only slept with one guy
    Sorry mom
  3. I butt-chugged in college
  4. I never heard of the song "Row Row Row Your Boat"
  5. You gave a midget a lap dance when you were drunk
    This lie was told to the lap dancer and he believed that he did it
  6. I'm training to become an exotic dancer
  7. I'm not hungry
  8. I haven't been drinking
  9. I orgasmed