Like c'mon at least give me a "haha"
  1. "Hey"
  2. "Hi"
  3. "Your dad keeps looking at my LinkedIn"
  4. "Are you in DC"
  5. "Are you in Philly"
  6. "Are you alive"
  7. "Are you coming to my party"
    He didn't
  8. "Hi last night was fun. Let me know if you ever wanna see my face again"
    He doesn't
  9. "I keep thinking about your chickens. RIP Kim, Khloe, and Kourtney"
    He had chickens named after the Royal Family and a hawk ate them or some shit
  10. "Sorry about Jeb"
  11. "Ur loss"