This list is made up of wordplay I've tweeted over the last year. Running themes: music and food. @miggles36 requested a list from me entitled MASTER OF PUNS AND MORE, but I figured I'd make a pun out of that. See how good at puns I am you guys?! Wouldn't I make a great dad???
  1. You Can Call Me Al Pastor
  2. Low Blood Sugar Sex Magik
  3. Coachella is too in tents for me.
  4. "Sir, I have some information about your account." "Hold up. I'm a Count?!"
  5. Enya Morricone
  6. Krauted Haus
  7. FaceTime with me from Thailand? iPad See You.
  8. Taipei Positive
  9. What did the music critic say about the under-rehearsed jazz combo? They kind of blew.
  10. Matsuhisa Matzo Pizza
  11. Vladimir Poutine and something about the Curds
  12. Wordsworth with Friendsworth
  13. What did the rotting corpse say to the freshly embalmed corpse? You must be my new tombmate!
  14. Joanna Threesom
  15. Ignorance is bris.
  16. Wry Coder
  17. Jack off all trades, masturbator of none.
  18. Resting Mensch Face
  19. You're a veterinarian? Sick, dawg!
  20. "How's that performance piece you've been working on in the Czech Republic?" "Oh it's still a work in prague."
  21. DomSub DeLuise
  22. The test came back negative for viral marketing.
  23. High selfie steam.
  24. Typical Berlin hipster outfit: black clothes, white tschüss.
  25. When casual racism spews forth from an elegantly dressed individual, we must then call it semi-formal racism.
  26. No shirt, Shylock.
  27. Don't be an anti-Maxxer.