NEW DANCE MOVES TO TRY THIS WEEKEND

@yrfriendrachel is my dance partner tomorrow night. Now we can be on the same page.
  1. The Full Metal Jacket (1987)
    After the popularity of The Roger Rabbit (1989) and The Running Man (1988), here's another dance craze based on a popular late 80s film: do 100 push-ups, mime beating up your dance partner with a bar of soap in a towel, shoot yourself!
  2. The Whiplash (2014)
    Aka "Not My Tempo." One dance partner rushes, the other drags. Berate one another, bleed profusely from hands, abandon all narrative logic as the song careens towards it's explosive conclusion.
  3. The Tinder
    Swipe left, swipe left, swipe left, swipe left, swipe left, swipe left, swipe left, swipe left, swipe left, swipe left, swipe left, swipe left, swipe left, swipe left, swipe left, swipe right. Run out of the room.
  4. The SXSW
    Tell everybody you're going to dance, print out flyers advertising that you're going to dance, drive to Texas, see someone else who is dressed just like you dancing on stage for a great crowd, get super pumped, sleep in your van, dance in a bar the following day for an audience of 6 people, get wasted on free beer, eat some tacos, drive home.
  5. The Angeleno Falling In Love With New York
    Even though you saw a guy jerking off on the train during your commute, even though an older woman yelled at you at the bodega, even though a pigeon shat on your shoulder, even though it's going to snow again and you just cleaned your boots, even though you blow through cash like it's your job, even though you can't get any peace and quiet... surround yourself with people you love, and dance with reckless abandon until the end of time.