REAL LIVE AUTHENTO TINDER BIOS: SEATTLE EDITION

QUIZ: Which one of these people did I have a depressing drink with last night?
  1. β€’
    Sorry Seattle I'm a Patriots fan.
    Samantha, 24
  2. β€’
    GOT A LOTTA LAYERS
    Michelle, 23
  3. β€’
    I'll show you my dad bod if you show me yours.
    Denise, 34
  4. β€’
    I live a healthy and smiley life! The terrified little dude is my nephew.
    Keely, 29
  5. β€’
    Forget these white girls, I need some variation...especially if she very Asian.
    Elim, 24
  6. β€’
    CrasH . bOOm , BaNG !! .,
    Laura, 25
  7. β€’
    Hair Hair Hair!! I love a sexy haircut. Short on the sides and a swoosh on top... Professionally sculpted to the face... Did I mention I like hair? And eyebrows too 😘 ... Personality is good... Don't be shy... Swipe right I'm a pole πŸ’ƒ Go Seahawks πŸ’™πŸ’šπŸ’™ Bald ok πŸ‘΄ 😍 tattoos Criminals ok, but tell the truth...I will check πŸ˜«πŸ”« I have 😺😺
    Zenobia, 34
  8. β€’
    Be weird with me, and I'm alllll yours.
    Madison, 25 -- we matched! She was a webcam spambot
  9. β€’
    The only thing you need to know about me is this: I own a coffee mug of Nicolas Cage naked in space.
    Lauren, 26
  10. β€’
    Happiness begins with you. Not with your relationship, your friends, or your job. But with you.
    Tonja, 26
  11. β€’
    I hate mayonnaise. I am also super indoorsy. I am a highly successful business woman who still believes in the power of shoulder pads in a suit jacket. I also wear pumps instead of heels because I value my feet. Don't talk to me unless you are worth 6 figures at least. Also, if you like vacuuming, call me! (I fucking hate that too)
    Shavonne, 34
  12. β€’
    A pleasure to have in class.
    Madeline, 23
  13. β€’
    Anyone know a good translation to Frege's 'Die Grundlagen der Arithmetik'? ☁️☁️☁️ I call Seattle home. πŸšͺπŸ› **sorry, dogs not included; shown for scale and/or marketing distraction
    Meiska, 35
  14. β€’
    I have a really impressive cat gif collection. Looking for someone who wants to watch cute animal videos with me, take snuggle naps.(I'm not interested in hookups or open relationships}
    Amethyst, 30
  15. β€’
    Not good at Tinder at all.
    Liz, 34
  16. β€’
    Put a baby in me
    Rachel, 25