8 Things to Remember When Visiting New York With Your Teen Daughter

  1. 1.
    She actually DOESN'T remember who the Rockettes are.
    Even though every Thanksgiving for the last 15 years you planted her and her brother in front of the Macy's Dqy Parade and said "Here come the Rockettes!" just before telling the story of how her brother stopped breast feeding for good the first time he saw them.
  2. 2.
    She won't want to be photographed in front of the iconic LOVE sculpture on Avenue of the Americas.
    She will, in fact, shake her head at you silently and give you a cold stare meant to stop you in your tracks as she sees you smile broadly and whip out your cell phone- to which you instantly say "Oh God I know. I would never do that to you, so cheesy, right? I was just going to check my messages"
  3. 3.
    She also won't want to be photographed at Rockerfeller Center.
    But remember, you are her mother and sometimes you still have say and anyway the sky is the perfect shade of gray and all the flags are unfurling at the same time and there's a lady with a hot pink umbrella that will add humor to the scene so make her do it anyway. And the best part is, the umbrella will turn inside out and not only did you capture your daughter looking glumly resigned, you caught that umbrella and the flags and shit and it was all worth it.
  4. 4.
    She will promise to get up no later than 9 but she will be telling a great falsehood.
    She can only ever get up at 10:15. That's it. Get used to it.
  5. 5.
    She will insist that Central Park is too crowded.
    She has no idea what a crowded Central Park actually looks like, so while you recognize that this park is sparsely populated for the time of year (Spring Break) and how many people actually live in Manhattan (9 million? 12 million?) she still keeps saying that she "wants to find an area that isn't crowded like this part," just go with it. Say, "Well, lets keep walking and try to find one."
  6. 6.
    She will walk 8 feet infront of you if you dare to use the hotel's large, orange, free umbrella while walking around the city.
    Do this at your own risk.
  7. 7.
    She will suddenly be tired of New York.
    And so will you. But what you really both need is downtime, away from each other to recharge. She will love some lunch and then 3 hours alone in your hotel room. This means that you have 3 hours to explore on your own. Or perhaps find a Chinese Masaage specialist 5 flights up in an old building on 45th and get the most painful and hands-down best massage you've ever had in your life before you go back to the hotel room to get ready for your Broadway show.
  8. 8.
    She won't understand for a long time how important this trip was for you, for both of you.
    But she will.