Things I Mutter When Passing the First Class Cabin vs When I'm Sitting in the First Class Cabin

I've flown in the last row of coach, middle seat, next to the bathroom and I've flown in seat 1A...and pretty much every seat in between. But no matter how many times I fly, boarding usually goes something like this:
  1. When sitting in coach and passing first class...
  2. Passing Row 1
    I hate you guys so much right now.
  3. Passing Row 2
    Really though, screw you guys.
  4. Passing Row 3
    You're like, 6 years old and you're sitting in first class?!
  5. Passing Row 4
    Take your sunglasses off, we're inside.
  6. Passing Row 5
    I hope you spill that champagne on your iPad (ok this one is reserved for red eye flights which are extra infuriating).
  7. When I'm sitting in first class...
    Internally: "MWAHAHAH, sucks to be you guys." Externally keeping it cool while I sip champagne while on my iPad while wearing sunglasses. Jk I'm not the sunglasses guy in first class.
  8. Then I sit in coach again.
    And the cycle repeats.
  9. But at the end of the day...I'm just happy to be on a plane, looking at clouds and to be going somewhere...no matter where I'm sitting.
    #cantwealljustgetalong?