my twitter drafts

a selection of garbage; some lost gems, most unintelligible mutterings
  1. it's a song lyric
    but like. song lyric? or cry for help? you decide!
  2. at one point there was a song on my work playlist, at my retail job if you will, about a girl who, AND I QUOTE, is 'stuck at my retail job. i hate this place. i live for my breaks.'
    after a week or so of me actually opening my ears rather than passive aggressively tuning out our garbage work playlist, I caught on and made an effort to listen to the lyrics in order to google them later (an impossible feat. im still unable to find it/am unconvinced those lyrics I remember are correct) because REALLY! our RETAIL JOB okay-ed this song for our playlist! and then we SUSPICIOUSLY got a new playlist. clearly by my rambling this is An Ordeal I couldn't cut down to 140 characters
  3. Retail Job Song Attempt 1
    boring. no effort. not worthy.
  4. Retail Job Song Attempt 2
    i love that you can pinpoint the literal moment i gave up. it's worth a note that both drafts were made days apart, and i remember deleting several more in sheer frustration. we also don't even have a work playlist anymore. just taunting silence. i will never find the Retail Job Song. i will never be able to craft a tweet about the Retail Job Song. it haunts me, and also my drafts.
  5. blink
    i found this too wordy. and also mean, due to writing it before actually hearing the album. but now that i have, a whole 2 times, i can confirm that the new blink album was in fact Very Eh. two wavy in-between thumbs up and thumbs down hand gestures from this guy. so i don't feel bad in saying that ACTUALLY this is a thing i want more than any other thing i have ever wanted in the world, ever. fund my kickstarter indeed. & i might tweet this. sorry mark
  6. don't remember writing this one but i stand by it
    but why would the people say AHHHWAHAHWAH. are they choking? are they okay? are they practicing their super villain laughs? should.... should they be practicing harder? because, wow, poor attempt you guys. also leave me and my dog alone. we are old and cute and want no part in your evil-doing
  7. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
    whew! lucky that all this nonsense that nobody would read is now immortalized in this dumb list that, also, nobody will read!