A DAY IN THE LIFE OF MY CAT

Her name is Joseph, and she's a pain in the ass. A cute one, but a pain in the ass nonetheless.
  1. 4:50 AM
    Due to my rampant insomnia, I wake up and consider getting out of bed. I turn the light on, and she gives me dirty looks because it's too early for her. I turn the light off and attempt to go back to sleep.
  2. 6:30 AM
    I wake up again, and she immediately decides it's time to be pet. She's very needy.
  3. 8:10 AM
    She cries incessantly for canned cat food because she's a food snob and the dry food isn't good enough for her. I give in to shut her up.
  4. 8:44 AM
    She retires to the bedroom for her post-breakfast nap.
  5. 9:20 AM
    Still sleeping.
  6. 10:37 AM
    Still sleeping.
  7. 11:50 AM
    Still sleeping.
  8. 12:21 PM
    Sleeping until I enter the room. Then she wakes up and demands attention.
  9. 12:29 PM
    Sleeping again.
  10. 1:40 PM
    I have to leave for work, but she is still sleeping. But now she has moved from the bed to the back of the couch.
  11. 1:40 PM-7:20 PM
    I am at work, so I don't know what she does. I assume she's sleeping.
  12. 7:20 PM
    I arrive home from work, and she immediately demands both food and attention. She's a very high maintenance cat.
  13. 7:58 PM
    She's eaten, and now she is taking her post meal bath.
  14. 8:11 PM
    Now she decides it's time for more attention while I am trying to use my laptop. Since she doesn't take no for an answer, we instead watch Supergirl (I'm catching up; it's the episode where Kara loses her powers. Side note: how does everyone not realize that Kara is Supergirl?).
  15. 8:30 PM
    She goes back to sleep on the back of the couch, where she remains so long that I have to check to make sure she is still alive. She is.
  16. 10:17 PM
    She begins acting a fool all around the living room. Like...I don't know what the hell she's doing. She's running around and jumping on the ottoman and rolling around and stuff. So weird.
  17. 10:36 PM
    She goes back to sleep.
  18. 10:47 PM
    It is time for me to sleep now as well. Naturally this is when she wakes up and decides it's time for more attention. She follows me to my bed.
  19. 11:04 PM
    I turn the light off and go to sleep. She goes in my closet and fucks around because apparently she's wide awake since she's been sleeping all day. Asshole.