THE 411 ON TWOMEDIOCREGIRLS

We're Jamie and Erika, two mediocre girls. We created this alter ego three years ago in a failed attempt to become Internet stars. Here's our origin story:
  1. We met 3 years ago in Tulsa, OK and immediately bonded over shared quirks like our inability to make left turns while driving and our fear of talking on the phone in front of people.
  2. Deciding that life was too hard and working 40 hours per week was "too much," we set out on a quest to get rich quick or die trying.
  3. We initially decided our best bet was to seek YouTube fame as Erika had previously attempted. See Exhibit A: https://youtu.be/yUSpnTLnMNk
  4. In front of the crudely painted green screen we drank the obligatory glass of wine to wash down our bars of Xanax and set out to make our YouTube dreams come true.
  5. You may notice there's no Exhibit B. That's because we were too anxious and self-critical to watch the playback once we sobered up. (Also, contouring wasn't really a thing in 2012.)
  6. Traumatized and broken, we abandoned our YouTube dream and forged on working for The Man.
  7. Flash forward 3 years and Erika wrecked our life by having a baby and the audacity to move to the booming metropolis of Wichita, KS to be close to family. 😒
  8. With the advent of @list we decided we could get in on the ground floor and pursue our dream of Internet stardom despite our newfound long distance relationship.
  9. How do we get verified @bjnovak?