Screenshots I Have on My Phone, Explained

  1. A good friend has joked that she's going to become a nun after a bad breakup. I've told her I'm okay with the new life as long as she learns how to make me cheese and lets me visit for quiet weekends occasionally. Today, I assured her that nuns still get to eat donuts.
  2. My belly wasn't happy with the probiotics I had (they were leftover from the last time I tried them; I'm a slow learner sometimes), so I asked my husband to rescue me and bring home the good ones.
  3. "Take this Buzzfeed quiz! Here are my results!"
    I am totally a Ravenclaw, but they nailed the hybrid house.
  4. My uncle and his on again/off again girlfriend/baby mama went to Vegas. I totally expected elopement, but my sister said he told her they weren't. I woke up to this post at 1 am. Still not sure if they really got a trashy Vegas wedding or if it was a joke. Only 7 people liked the post.
    Note: this will be his 4th marriage.
  5. I once made an inappropriate joke about the 9:11 class period end time to the aforementioned aspiring nun. Now we send each other Never Forget images when we come across them.
    "What time does 2nd period end?" "9:11. Never forget." *Hangs head in shame*
  6. I'm sure it's not a scam!
    Too ridiculous not to Instagram.
  7. "If I become a nun, I'll get to wear great shoes!" "No. Just no."
  8. When my husband was out of town last week, we FaceTimed him. Our son was adorable and kept waving at his Da and kissing the phone.
  9. Screenshot of a selfie that I had posted to Instagram and deleted off my phone. I decided I wanted it for a profile picture. The end of the second 14+ hour day for student led conferences this fall.