Things My Husband Does That I Don't Get

Stay tuned for Vol. 2 of this list in the future... I'll have more I'm sure.
  1. Scratches his nuts then smells his hands
  2. Why he takes an hour to sit on a toilet to wait for poop to come out
    Why not go when "it's time?"
  3. Gels his short hair
    Only after its cut... How much styling does a short hair cut need???
  4. Pushes out a fart in public
  5. Has to pee as soon as we get to any location
  6. Listens to the GPS even though he knows it's wrong
  7. Spend 2hrs deciding which ugly Jordan's to buy
  8. Buying EXPENSIVE ugly Jordan's
    Because a lot of Jordan's are ugly
  9. Uses my razor
    He manscapes and had his own razor but uses mine... I thought I was supposed to use his?
  10. Shaves his arms
  11. Ask me where something is when we've gone over it several times
    Here's a King of Queens scene as an example: http://youtu.be/whLeL1JGq9k
  12. Falls asleep when I'm talking to him
  13. Gives our daughter candy before dinner
  14. Question this li.st and wondering if I typed it up
    Of course I did, ya basic bitch!!