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Why is waking up at 5am even legal?
  1. In order to pee, which I have to do badly, I have to get out of bed... And move my body... And walk...
  2. I can barely hear the roar of my hungry stomach over the 27 alarms I have to set to wake up
  3. There's just no chance for a bath this early because I'll fall asleep FOR SURE... so that's another 10 minutes I have to stand up at this ridiculous hour
2 more...
Unless it was my Bugatti... He never specified
  1. John Mayer's bed
  2. The fangs of Bill Compton
  3. Hogwarts
8 more...