SOME OF MY FAVORITE THINGS THAT HAVE EVER BEEN SAID TO ME
These are all things that were music to my ears, either because they made me feel really supported, or they were hilarious and endearing, or exactly what I needed to hear at exactly the right moment. My memory isn't the greatest, so for now this will seem pretty random and incomplete 🤷🏻♂️ I'll add more as I think of them!
- •"People or no people?"- The mâitre d' at Dan Tana's in Hollywood, faintly remembering from last time I'd eaten there that I'd asked to sit far away from other people. I'VE NEVER FELT SO UNDERSTOOD. He's one of the great sassy characters I've met in LA, and he says plenty of other great things too, like "Ugh, you again" when you walk in and "thank you for leaving" when you walk out. Dan Tana's is the greatest.
- •"Is that enough cheese for you? Let me know if you want some more."- One of the servers, again at Dan Tana's. This was after bringing me a mug full of Parmesan cheese to go with my spaghetti bolognese.
- •"You're in the right spot. Now sing, man!"- Jan Gaye, the widow of Marvin Gaye, responding to a photo I tagged her in where I was singing "Marvin-style" (lying down on a couch in the studio and holding the mic above me). The greatest honor!
- •"We had sex to your album last night."- A couple different friends over the years, I've listed about this before and it's still the best compliment I've ever received.
- •"You're a gem."- @lame, delivering my second-favorite compliment.
- •"Glad you're in Cali where you belong."- @SpaceCase, texting me after I made it back out here in December and reminding me of what was in my heart as she has many times since we've been friends.
- •"That voice is like butter."- An ex from a long time ago, putting the moves on me the night we met, which worked like a charm.
- •"You're the only person who has ever made LA seem even slightly appealing to me."- My old Northern CA friend Brian, responding to one of my many, many palm tree photos on Instagram recently. Since the magic of LA is one of the few things I believe in, I'm really glad my love of it comes across in that way.
- •"The masturbatory life of gentlemen fascinates me."- Ex, during a great, frank phone call on the subject last summer before we stopped talking. She had a way with words.
- •"They are abandoned beasts of the wild, nipping at people with their little teeth because it's all they've ever done and it's all they'll ever do. 'Nip, nip, gonna bite cha!' They have done Fuck. All. with their lives. They will do Fuck. All. with their lives. They are inconsequential. Leave them in the dust, brother."- My best friend Marc, summarizing, in his own characteristically poetic and interesting way, his feelings on the group chat bullies during one of our long talks where he helped me get through the trauma of what happened. He really has a knack for bandaging a person's wounds when they're in pain. As you can see.
- •"Stay gracious."- My friend Chayt, channeling Katy Perry while advising me to rise above the gutter drama.
- •"Chet da bee doh-dah!!" (Or, "check the recorder" as I'd refer to it)- Another ex, doing an impression of the Michael Jackson caricature that appeared in an episode of South Park. I would ask her to shout this at me from time to time, because it was spot-on and hilarious and also because it was a perfect example of her good sense of humor re: people making fun of MJ, her idol.
- •"We need toilet paper. But, wait- it has to be a certain kind. Listen to me. Look at me. Are you listening? Cottonelle, ripples, w/ aloe. Don't try to be cute & get any of that Charmin bullshit. Cottonelle. Ripples. Aloe. If you can't, like don't even..if they, if you can't come back w/ that particular kind of toilet paper, don't come back at all."- My friend Liz, pushing me around about groceries when I was staying with she and her mom once. I only have this word for word because my friends and I once made a Twitter account just for Liz quotes. She's said some of the most incredible and hilarious shit I've ever heard in my life.
- •"I have all the maps from N64 Goldeneye memorized and I will kill you very quickly."- Someone I was flirting with, in the first few days of banter. It made me laugh really hard to imagine those two statements being unrelated.
- •"Always remember - the music is bigger than us."- My friend Frank Bell, spoken when we stole a quiet moment during a rowdy house party after we played a show in Philly. If you have the kind of personality where a line like this elicits an eye roll, then ya know, fine. But I've always remembered it and it's guided me through some important life decisions. Even where I'm staying right now, tucked away in the peaceful woods of Topanga Canyon, was a decision made from remembering this and saying to myself, "Ok. The songs come first."
- •"You are loved."- My mom, saying something that, sure, we all usually get to hear from at least a few people in our lives. But I think it's a reminder that means the most when it's coming from your mother.
- •"My boy!"- My dad, anytime he answered the phone when I called in those last few years. He always sounded like hearing from me was the best part of his day.