1. I found Turtletaub on the street this summer.
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    He was in a little cage next to a ziplock bag of pellets. The sign on the cage read "Feed me one pellet twice a day."
  2. He was a red eared glider, and within two weeks, I was taking him to Baltimore to visit the set of House of Cards.
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    He really liked my rings and floating in sinks and bathtubs.
  3. He also met Tig Notaro.
  4. I named him after the Bojack Horseman character played by JK Simmons because just like that Turtletaub mine was only pretending to be Jewish.
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  5. I read that red eared gliders can live a really long time...like 40-50 years. I don't think I ever would have gotten bored hanging out with him.
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  6. We did not get that long though.
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  7. My favorite parts of him were his belly shell, which were full of beautiful, swirly circles...
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  8. ....and his curiosity.
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    You would think turtles just sit there, but Turtletaub was always doing something. When I'd take him out, he'd explore every nook and cranny. He moved so fast; more like a mouse than a turtle.
  9. He had gotten bigger, but I hadn't taken any recent pictures of him.
  10. Yesterday I left the house with him in the cage and the sun lamp on. Usually when I get home, the water is a perfectly warm temperature but not too hot. I'd find him basking on his rock, or scrambling up the side to meet me for dinner.
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  11. Last night when I got home, he was lying belly-up in very hot water. I thought I could save him; I thought I could feel him move and blink when I ran him under cold water.
  12. I did that for an hour, and kept getting angry that Ari was trying to separate us. He just wasn't paying attention!!! The turtle was definitely alive, and if he wasn't, I would know, okay???
  13. Turtletaub died sometime yesterday. He was alone and I wasn't there. I hope he wasn't scared. I hope it was quick, just like him.
  14. I'll miss you, Turtletaub. I'm sorry I couldn't take care of you. You took care of me during a really rough summer.
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  15. You were a good pet.
  16. Goodbye