THINGS I STILL HAVEN'T MASTERED

  1. How to properly portion my pasta
    I always make too much and then eat it anyway and have to curl up in a ball of pain after eating too much
  2. The perfect oat-to-water ratio in my oatmeal
  3. How to work the icloud
    I mean what is this
  4. How to only have a few drinks
    Still figuring out how not to be a raging alcoholic
  5. How to actually accomplish everything I need to in a week
    Has anyone else figured this one out?
  6. How not to eat the whole bag of Reece's minis in one sitting
    This I suspect is beyond human capabilities
  7. How not to binge TV shows to the point where it hinders your daily life
    Help
  8. How to be able to take the time to always be sleek and hairless
    I shaved the top half of my legs for the first time in like over a month and it was a nightmare and then almost burned my vagina off with Nair
  9. How to be on time
    ????
  10. How to dress appropriately for the weather
    Mom help
  11. How not to be sarcastic and mean to boys at bars
    Oh well
  12. The ability to know when to shut up
  13. The ability to keep my chill when someone says they didn't like the ending of LOST