I have a pair of jeans that have a various number of stains on them. Let's take a look at what those stains could be...shall we?
  1. SUPER GLUE
    I one time super glued my hand to my pants.. How, you ask? GREAT question. I don't know. I accidentally tore some skin off my finger tips and there's super glue dots on the knee of my left leg. Don't trust super glue. Never trust super glue.
  2. PENS
    A yellow gel pen exploded in my pocket so there's an awkward greenish/yellow glittery stain on my right back that kind of looks like I peed myself in one place.
  3. BLOOD
    I had to give my cat a sedative so we could fly on a plane and she got scared and bit me and tore skin and I was bleeding but didn't want to draw attention to it but my hand wouldn't stop bleeding so I used my jeans and now there's a red blood stain on my right hip...its parallel to the yellow gel pen stain