25 THINGS ABOUT MY BROTHER ON HIS 25TH BURTHDAY

  1. 1.
    He scored 96% with Bernie Sanders on the isidewith.com quiz
    Which was a big surprise all around
  2. 2.
    He works for the Kansas City Chiefs
    A job that I'm even jealous of
  3. 3.
    He has never once faved a single tweet of mine
    I'm starting to suspect that he has me muted
  4. 4.
    He is terrified of the song, "Sweet Dreams" by the Eurythmics
  5. 5.
    He started cursing so much in middle school that my parents established a family curse word in hopes that it would curb his vulgarity
    It didn't work
  6. 6.
    He has had at least two Bud Light Lime-a-Rita's in his life
    Other than this, I have never seen or heard of him consuming alcohol
  7. 7.
    He used to run cross country
  8. 8.
    All of his hot friends have slowly gotten very un-hot as he has done the opposite
    Not that I think my brother is hot??? We just have the same genes. He was bound to catch up to me eventually.
  9. 9.
    His eating habits are a point of fascination to my roommate
    He's very picky
  10. 10.
    He loves the song "Party in the U.S.A" by Miley Cyrus
  11. 11.
    I just unfriended his ex-girlfriend's brother on facebook
    Very racist guy!
  12. 12.
    His godparents are way better than mine and I'll resent him forever for it
  13. 13.
    He has been using my old laptop for about three years now
    A fact we all just found out a few days ago
  14. 14.
    He has gotten one speeding ticket in his life
    When he was 19
  15. 15.
    He is the only male grandchild on my dad's side
    Not that gender is real tho
  16. 16.
    He one time gave my parents and I each ceramic tiles that he painted in his high school art class
    They looked like the handiwork of a 5th grader
  17. 17.
    I think his favorite movie is still "Hook"
  18. 18.
    He cried when my parents got rid of their old floral couch
    He was like 4, in his defense
  19. 19.
    My grandma proudly refers to him as her "#1" grandchild
  20. 20.
    He sweats much more than me
    Which seems like an awful life for him to live. I sweat a lot
  21. 21.
    He cried when I punched him once
    And I cried because I felt so bad. Even though he definitely deserved it. I was 8ish and he was 11ish.
  22. 22.
    I think his favorite TV show is "The Wire"
  23. 23.
    He didn't know he was circumcised until he was 12.
  24. 24.
    When he was ~4, he cried when he heard "Can You Feel the Love Tonight" on the radio because it made him feel sad for Simba
  25. 25.
    He one time said "This is my Vietnam" after seeing my high school production of "Romeo and Juliet"