TEN COOLEST THINGS ABOUT MY DAD

  1. 1.
    He got drunk at a family wedding when he was 17 and did a solo dance and lip sync to Tina Turner's "You Better Be Good to Me". Then other family members started requesting it at their own weddings because he was such a hit. He lip synced it to my mom at their wedding.
    Now he and I do wedding lip syncs together. "Proud Mary" ran for awhile, and now we've moved on to Lady Gaga's "Gypsy".
  2. 2.
    He is better than any mom ever at taking care of sick kids.
    Anything I needed? He'd get it. Even if we didn't have it - he'd go out and buy it and bring it to me. I got to stay home from school with zero arguing. If I was throwing up, he made the best cinnamon sugar toast in the world. I still can't make it as good as he did.
  3. 3.
    He always eats super fast, so he would do lounge acts after he finished his dinner, while we still ate.
    He'd get the serving spoon and use it as a microphone. Big hits were, "is this thing on?" And "just flew in from _______ and boy are my arms tired!"
  4. 4.
    He didn't ever read books or tell bedtime stories. He acted them out.
    He did a character named Tommy Poopenopolis who went on ridiculous adventures and had crazy things to say. I would laugh so hard. He would do a "convertible table" afterward, which was a weird phrase we made up for him tucking us in like we were wrapped in a cocoon.
  5. 5.
    It took him 7 years to get his undergrad
    But he did it! He didn't give up! He transferred schools to be with my mom halfway through and she really helped him. He got married and still managed to finish his last year.
  6. 6.
    He smoked for 23 years, and then quit.
    He hasn't smoked in 10 years. He goes through icebreaker mints like it's nobody's business, though.
  7. 7.
    He surprised me and bought tickets to the Kelly Clarkson/Clay Aiken concert when I was 8.
  8. 8.
    He has never once said anything negative about my majoring in comedy.
  9. 9.
    He ran a marathon when he was 40 and still smoking.
    Badass, really.
  10. 10.
    When my mom was hiding Diet Coke from me because she thought I drank too much, my dad knew where she hid it and he would sneak it to me.