1. Come February I'll be a quarter of a century old
    When I was 12 I thought I'd have had my life figured out by the time I was 25. HAH I'm just an 18-year-old trapped in a slightly older body
  2. Should I settle or chase after my dream job?
    Financial stability and being bored vs living my dream and having tons of stories to tell....
  3. When is all these alcohol going to develop into a beer gut
    Also my liver might be crying but I'm drowning it with more tequila
  4. Are all my friends hanging out without me?
    Major FOMO, also love your book @mindy
  5. Is there lipstick on my teeth?
    Damn you Marc Jacobs lipstick I bought for 42 bucks at Sephora
  6. Why are my socks sliding down again?
    I have to stop ordering lousy ass socks off amazon
  7. I spend all my money on make up
    Shouldn't I be like, investing it or something
  8. I have zero savings
    See above
  9. There's a very real possibility that I might die alone and no one will discover my decaying skeleton
    That, or my 20 dogs will brutally devour my flesh and bones
  10. Seriously, is there lipstick on my teeth?!?!
    Goddamnit it's a piece of chive from lunch, I'm so done.