MY SON'S BDAY PRESENTS, RANKED
He's recently five.
- •The Super Wings transforming planesThese things are a bitch to transform but he got them down pat in about an hour. I still can't transform them in a decent amount time though, so they lose ranking for being difficult 😠
- •The Stellosphere (large spaceship)A Miles from Tomorrowland toy that is five transports in one. We got this for him at Christmas, but six Transformers Rescue Bots in it was obvious he didn't need anymore presents so we decided to hold this one back. He still doesn't seem to notice it—even though it is now unwrapped 😕
- •The Optimus Prime Transformer tractorIt transforms and it hauls all of his other Rescue Bot toys. Or at least it has the ability to haul them. He simply has yet to utilize this feature. I was really hoping this was the solution to them being scattered about 😒
- •LegosHe can build amazing things but... Ouch my fu*king feet. I hoped it would take longer than a day. Nope, the worst shapes find the tenderest parts of my foot. (Yes, I recognize this as a parental rite of passage, but still...ouch) 😏
- •Hot WheelsAgain, my feet. His toys aren't even littering a communal area or hallway. They're kept strictly to his playroom. However, it is my job to close the curtains, and it requires me to cross the floor. Light on or off, it doesn't matter...there is simply no justice with small toys 😤
- •The pirate sword he wanted at Disney that I bought and held to give to him for his birthday.Oops. I just remembered this one. It is still hidden in our closet. Dammit 😑 It will absolutely be awesome though (until he has it taken away for bothering his sister with it. The struggle with boys, right @shanaz? 😉).
- •Captain America wall-walkerArguably the most enjoyable toy for any age. Except he tosses it onto impossible spots, where it lingers and aggravates me with its constant presence. (Keep it off the matte paint or I'm taking it away—that's the warning I plan to issue when this damn thing finally falls off the ceiling).
- •TMNT scooter and HelmetThey are awesome, mostly because he can already do tricks and the helmet was priced incorrectly and rang up for $5 instead of $24.95, which I did not notice until I got home and may have forgot to go back to the store and mention 😐
- •MoneyHe put it all in his savings, which makes me proud ☺️
- •BooksI am biased because I ❤️ books. But so far he loves them all so I feel no shame in giving them this ranking 😁