THINGS MY MOM SAID ON HER ER VISIT TONIGHT
The lady had herself a spill at the airport and found herself gifted with a broken ankle and a slow hospital process. Now, the audio:
- •Doc: "How did it happen?" Mom: "I was walking in platform shoes I don't have a license to wear."
- •Tech: "We're here to put on your cast." Mom: "Is it fashionable? Not pink. I said FASHIONABLE."
- •"I can't play Words with Friends. Fix my phone so I can play Words with Friends."I kinda expected "Where are my painkillers?!" To each their own!
- •Medics: "You will need to cut off your pants when you get home." Mom: "These are my favorite pants. No one is cutting anything."
- •(Looking around) "Come closer. I want to tell you guys a joke but I don't want to say 'gooze' too loud."Gooze is Persian for "fart". Her reaction to extreme pain: tell fart jokes. My mother, ladies and gentlemen.
- •Dad: "Don't break the other leg!" Mom: "I'm definitely going to break another leg, but it won't be mine!"